We had a good laugh in Singapore, Bankok and Singapore again in late January.
Earlier in the year I had casually mentioned to MrsB that I would probably be paying off in Singapore in late Jan and would she fancy a week there for some winter sunshine.
I had forgotten all about the conversation but luckily MrsB remembered just before Christmas so as I was on board and in that neck of the woods I thought I would organise a special trip.
I booked her on Singapore Airlines flight that leaves Heathrow at 11am and arrives Singapore at 7.30am and is my favourite flight down.
I was there all grins and cuddles when she arrived and whisked her off by MRT to our first destination.
We spent the first few days in one of our favourites The Berjaya Hotel in Duxton Road which is just on the edge of Chinatown. It is 5 mins walk form Tagon Pagur MRT station.
It is old school colonial inside and the staff are lovely and friendly. It might be a bit overpriced for what it is but then again this is Singapore and many things are.
The great bit, apart for its great location, is that you are just across the road from JJ's where the band Heritage play most nights. Absolutely awesome if you like your music form the era of Jethro Tull, Stones, Doors, Zepplin, Hendrix, Alman Bros, etc. The guitarists is a magician, the bassist sublime, the drummer rock steady, and the lead singer, fiddle, and harmonica player is wonderfully enigmatic and skillful. Just one of those things you have to do when in Singapore is get to JJ's on Duxton Road and see them play. It is a bit of a girly bar with hostesses trying to get you to buy them drinks but if you make it plain that you are there for the band they leave you alone.
Being an absolutely shit tourist (I cant see the point of wandering about looking at stuff) I decided to make the effort for MrsB as this was to be her "winter sunshine" holiday and I didn't think it fair for me to be dragging about all grumpy and obstructive and just wanting to bar hop as is my normal "waiting around" mode. So I decided to be more accommodating on the "grockle" front and organised a schedule that was mainly "nature" based, bearing in mind we were going to have two nights in that heaving mass of people known as Bankok later.
After I picked MrsB up from Changi and back to the hotel I suggested a short walk into an oasis of calm in the city called Pearls Hill. It was gentle and peaceful park with the hubbub of the city going on all around us. Later in the day we meandered about looking for a new pair of walking flip flops or sandals for MrsB and came across some of the more crazy aspects of street adornment up near Somerset MRT. After finding the required footwear we had a couple of G&Ts in No5 Emerald hill which is a glorious bit of old school Singapore bar life with the peanut shells on the floor and mad snake in liquor drinks available.
The next day we had a lazy start and then caught the MRT to have a wander around (and lunch in) the massive and free botanical gardens.
We came across this massive open air concert hall with some bloke singing away (really badly) making everyone laugh at his efforts, but the sound quality was superb.
MrsB was rather taken with the young maid painting under the parasol between the two statues
After a lovely lunch and lazy afternoon stroll around this quite awesome place we slowly made our way back into town towards the hotel but we stopped at a bar nearby and began chatting and laughing away ten to the dozen and after several G&Ts and pints and a snack the time was cracking on and we were well on the way to being "pissed right up" so we carried on and ended up in JJ's to see the band Heritage and staggered to our room some time after 2am and slept the lovely sleep of the gin, beer and fine music infused.
We had no plans until 1.30pm the next day and when we awoke we were both surprisingly chipper so we had a hearty if not late breakfast and waited the bus to come and get us for the days events the first of which was a trip to Jarong Bird Park.
What an amazing place and what incredible diversity of birds they have on show and how very close you can get to them. Sadly we have managed to lose some of the photos however the flamingos did make it onto the memory card. All I can suggest is that you go yourselves, and walk about as opposed to the silly train thing. A remarkable place.
After three hours there our driver turned up and took us to the terminus where we were transferred onto another bus ready for the "Night Zoo Safari". At this point I have to say that I am not a fan of zoos as I can't bear to see the cages, however pootling along on this little road train in the dark going past habitat enclosures with no visible bars as such was fascinating. The hyena's lions tiger rhino and other exotic creatures going about there nocturnal business under special lighting that meant they didn't see you. I know it was still a zoo and I know that they were still captive, but it did seem "a better option" .
So after passing within in a few feet sometimes of these amazing predator animals we were somewhat shocked when the only danger came with on mad buffalo thing that decided to charge at the train. There were a few squeals of discontent and fear (many of them from me) when that big horned fucker came running at the back of the train where MrsB and I were sat. No photos of that either as we were too busy working out where to run to or who to clamber over and trample on to get away.
The next day we had to be up to catch the flight to Bankok so we had a relatively early night and made our way to the Hotel Muse in Bankok. What a fine establishment that was and we were more than happy with the corner double aspect room giving us great views over the city.
The first thing was to get our kit off (and trunks on) and get up to the infinity pool they had. Although it was in great spot the "infinity" bit was rather spoilt by glass screens. A sort of infinity pool for wusses really, however it was nice to just lay about have a G&T or two and later treat ourselves to a great and romantic dressed up dinner on the rooftop terrace bar.
MrsB will give me hard time for putting up these pics because she said the bed is unmade??? but hopefully you get the idea of the place. Quite whacky having a window into the bathroom
Actually looking at the photos it doesn't do the room or the hotel much justice at all. It was all marble and dark wood and very comfy and a lot more roomy that the photos show.
Anyway next day we were off for a Tuk Tuk ride down to the flower and food market area next to the River of Kings fantastic hubble bubble of commerce and people going about there daily lives
Here is a young made chopping ginger
Here is Ginger
We had a good old wander about and also took in a riverboat ride through the canals and backwaters of Bankok. We took another Tuk Tuk back to the hotel.
Now on the subject of Tuk Tuks, they look great fun and sound whacky and are as much part of the landscape as the local faces but they are a fucking useless way to see the city of you are over 5 feet tall, because if you are all you can see is the side of the canopy as you trundle along. You have to lean outside to see anything which adds to the already considerable danger you are in by being in one of these flimsy death traps in the first place. However a visit to Bankok would not be complete without one so after our ride back to the hotel and chocking on the traffic fumes all conveniently at head height in a tuk tuk we arrived back at the hotel.
We changed to go out to place we had been recommended called "Asiatique" (with a name like that we should have known) which as it turned out was a bum steer and was basically a contrived Thai village and market that wasnt very authentic or interesting at all.
A bit like Darling Harbour isn't really Australia, if you get my drift.
It probably didn't help that on the river boat trip to get there Mrs B decides to tell this enormous Yarpie (south african) that if he insisted on smoking his cigar in front of her (we were sat behind and the smoke was blowing over us and the rest of the boat) then she would probably vomit over him.
I really did think it was going to kick off, or to be more precise, that I was going to get kicked to bits leaping in to defend any slights to her honour, (as gallant as ever that's me) as this bloke was a mountain, however he just grunted and carried on being south african ("I have a riiiight to smooke laady") and with MrsB s telling him that she also had the right to vomit on him she retreated to the back of the boat to cool down for the last few minutes of the journey. It would have been worth the hassle if the place was worth it.
We had a wander round becoming more disappointed by the minute and jumped in another Tuk Tuk and went back to a restaurant near the hotel and eat there (very nice too) and had a couple of jars and hit the hay ready for the return to Singapore the next day.
We took a detour to look at mount Fuji in Japan as you can clearly see here with MrsB looking at the view. No camera trickery or blue screen technology there then (arf arf)
We were heading to the Marina Bay Sands Hotel one of the new world iconic buildings which looks like this as you approach
I became all arty here and caught it in the middle of the Singapore Eye, fuck me I will be up for a photo journalist of the year award at this rate
It is an impressive building and the reason why we were going to stay there was that unless you were a guest of the hotel you couldn't use the infinity pool and having seen it two years ago when we went up for cocktails we just had to have a go in it.
Everything about the Marina Bay is classy from the guys who take your cases from the cab to the little string orchestra playing in the reception in Tower One
As we alighted the lift on floor 27 and made our way towards the room this is the view that greeted us outside the door to the room.
AS MrsB was getting her breath back form that little vista I ws in like Flynn and had to admit myself that it was an impressive space. 80 square meters with a windowed balcony all along one wall. A huge bathroom with massive walk in shower and the bath in a stunning position looking out over the city. A very large bed and mega sofa and comfy chairs, wardrobes walk in dressing room etc MrsB just had to stand and take it all in while I admit to running about like a mad dog shouting "hey look at this, Oh wow look at this, Hey there is beer in the fridge, oh gosh I think I will just go and stand in this huge space over here" etc etc.
Here is the view taken in three shots from the balcony
And of course the bath with MrsB in it
This is us looking out from the corridor one evening
Basically it was a plush gaff and we reveled in the luxury it afforded.
The infinity pool is just one of those experiences that if you can ever get the chance to do I would heartily recommend it. A bizarre yet exhilarating experience. I will let the photos do the talking.
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On our last night we had dinner in a great restaurant on Clarke quay that specialises in wonderful steaks form around the world and the next day we meandered about and made our way up to Changi Airport about 8 hours before the flight.
I was on a three pool quest and had ticked off the Bankok and Singapore infinity and now all that was left was the Changi Airport "airside" pool. Terminal 1/2 for those of you not in the know.
If you are ever on stop over make sure you have your trunks and go for a free swim although they will hire you a towel and robe. Changio Airport is magnificent and you can pootle about between terminals effortlessly and check out the Butterfly garden, the Cactus garden and bar, Sunflower garden, free cinema Koy carp lakes, swimming pool. If you get knackered, as MrsB was, they have sleeping terminals in the Rainforest Lounge at terminal one and food halls and great shopping and all in all just a great place to spend a few hours.
So here is me (not the fat bloke on the right but the one in the water) in the airside pool enjoying a dip before our flight back to the UK and a hectic schedule.
We had a fun and laughter and love filled time that was a tonic to both of us and barely spent a minute apart and loved every second of the whole adventure.
This is what happened next.
Depart Singapore 0030 on 01 Feb
Arrive Heathrow 0740 on 01 Feb (flight time 13 hours)
Collect hire car Heathrow 0820 on 01 Feb
Drive to Dorchester arrive 1030 on 01 Feb and hand over the hire car.
Get car hire people to drive us to the lorry hire place Dorset Vehicle Rentals and go through the process of hiring the truck.
Leave Dorchester in truck at 1100 and drive to Bridport.
Leave MrsB at her mothers at 1130 and drive to builders merchants.
Load up the insulation finish at 1200 and drive to MrsB's mothers.
Arrive at 1210 and have a coffee and commence loading the lorry with the rest of our stuff and also load my pick up truck with my sons stuff who is leaving to live in London.
Finish loading and set off for Portsmouth ferry port at 1615 in the lorry with MrsB and our dog Minnie.
Arrive ferry port at 1815 and go through the freight processing and get sent to the queue to board.
Boarded by 1940.
Had a shower changed and then up to the A la carte restaurant for a big dinner and some nice wine. We were both back in our cabin and fast asleep by 2230.
Arrive St Malo at 0830 and disembark at 0840.
Arrive at house after a detour for groceries and coffee at 1030.
Get the house opened up and make sure the sheds are habitable and that elec and water all good.
Get the truck stuck in the mud trying to turn around and spend an hour digging it out and making a gravel path for it. 
Unload truck and stow the stuff in the house.
At 1730 leave MrsB and Minnie in the sheds and drive to Caen
Depart on 2300 to Portsmouth
Arrive Portsmouth at 0645 03 Feb. Disembark and drive truck to Dorchester.
Arrive Dorchester at 9.00 and leave truck in Hire compound.
Son arrives in my pick up truck from London after moving his stuff there. I drop him back to the train station and then drive on to Bridport, where I arrive at about 1030 with intention of having lunch with an old mate after making sure that mother in law's garages are all clean and tidy.
Stop at Bridport filling station and fill up the pick up truck ready for the afternoons journey back to the ferry port.
Travel half a mile after filling up and the pick up truck breaks down.
Call my good mate Scruff who is our family mechanic (as well as many other families I might add: (I dont want you to get the impression we are posh and have our own mechanic on a retainer, arf arf) who suggests I take off the filler cap and see what I can smell.
Ahhhhrrrrgggghhhhhh it is fucking petrol I smell and my truck is a fucking diesel.
Tit snot and arse wipe.
It was all going so well!!!!
Oh woe is me!!!
Anyway after having a small tantrum with myself for being so stupid and it being a Sunday so no-one being available to pump it out for me had to call RAC and they came and organised the "pump out company" to come and get me and do the deed.
So at 410 pounds lighter in the wallet (that's 70 quid for the initial top up with petrol, 255 quid to get it pumped out and another 85 quid to fill it up with diesel) I then drove back to Portsmouth for the 2030 crossing to St Malo on 3rd Feb.
Arrived back at home at 1030 on the 4th, had a coffee changed into working gear and started on installing the insulation.
